Now, you can get your best night’s rest without uncomfortably compressing your breasts. That’s right, an enterprising inventor has come up with the practical, but kind of hilarious, Comfy Breasts™ pillow to keep your humps from being a hassle when lying on your stomach. A soft sort of elongated body pillow, Comfy Breasts™ has a rectangular cut-out in the bust region to allow your assets their own space without crushing them under your body weight against the mattress.
A certain, ahem, small cross-section of us flat out didn’t know that this is a burden that needed addressing. InventorSpot.com explains, “Large-breasted women can feel like total boobs trying to lie down comfortably for a massage or chiropractic treatment, or just trying to enjoy a bit of sun at the beach. In addition to a lot of pressure on sensitive body tissue, it can also be like trying to be comfortable with your head hanging off a cliff. It sounds kind of funny, but it is serious business.”
The accessory has also been suggested to ease the discomfort of women (or men) recovering from breast cancer procedures such as a biopsy or mastectomy, and as an aid to breast-feeding mothers. More casual suggested uses include a chest-friendly day at the beach or a voluptuousness-relieving visit to the spa for a treatment. The plush product is available in four different sizes, based on the measurement across the breasts, and comes with a zip off cover for easy machine wash.
There is also apparently Comfy Breasts™ for men variation in the works with convenient cut-out to cushion male genitals that may need extra room or have to be treated delicately after prostate procedures or a vasectomy, for example. No word on if multiple sizes are an option for the potent gentleman whose manhood literally gets in the way of a his comfort.
Check out the ComfyBreasts Kickstarter (which surpassed its $2,500 goal by two-hundred dollars) for the full story. Would a Comfy Breasts™ pillow help you to sleep easier and alleviate breast stress, or is this gimmick a boneheaded booby-trap? — Casandra Armour